Review of 3 from Hell (2019) by Thequietgamer — 07 Nov 2021

There's a pretty good idea here as 3 From Hell intends to take the Firefly family down to Mexico to see what chaos they can cause south of the border. Unfortunately, due to the position Rob Zombie left them in at the end of The Devil's Rejects he first has to make it believable that they can come back to create more carnage. This forces things into a start so slow it takes up half the running-time as the redneck killer clan must escape incarceration, replace Captain Spaulding who gets written out because of Sid Haig's illness (R.I.P.), and become involved in an extended torture sequence involving a prison warden's loved ones that comes off like a direct retread of the motel segment from the film's aforementioned predecessor.

Of course, even when Zombie finally manages to bring the group together and sets them on the run again there is still a rather serious problem: none of the action feels inspired. There's plenty of the director's signature vulgarity and filth, but it's as if he slapped it all onscreen for a paycheck rather than the crudity being the result of having any truly creative vision. I did get a kick out of the more absurd aspects such as the bloody showdown with the satanic luchador gang in the final act, but the majority of this is flat and strained in a way I'm not used to from a filmmaker with a usually potent distinctive style.

So much is just watching the villainous protagonists goof off and have a good time in a twisted mimicry of endearing road trip flicks because their creator made the mistake of thinking we actually like them. I suppose that's a reasonable assumption to have about an audience returning for a third outing with these characters, but given their irritating personalities and the appeal other brutal horror franchises have enjoyed, for example Friday the 13th or Saw, I think common-sense would dictate we're here for the grindhouse violence above all else rather than out of a genuine attachment to the monsters leaving bodies in their wake. I certainly didn't want to see them survive the vengeful son of one of their former victims who shows up once they flee the country after all.

A quality worth praising is the casting of Richard Brake who evidently impressed so much on the set of 31 he was chosen to fill the hole left behind by the passing of a horror icon, which he does in another notably mesmerizing deranged fashion. The gore is also really impressive in spots. However, while the previous movie simply wasn't for me, this chapter in the chronicles of these psychopaths is a genuine misstep. A tepid mixture of halfhearted savagery and lackadaisical hang around vibes that amount to another significant step back from the standout thrills of House of 1000 Corpses while carrying with it the objectionable hints of having only been created for a payday. Hopefully the musician turned exploitation cinema maestro can get this meat wagon back on track since if this made any real money given his apparent affection for these murderous degenerates it likely won't be the last we see of the trio, and I'd rather not dread their next bloodbath.