Review of Absolon (2003) by Arthur M — 21 Sep 2011

Science fiction cannot survive under modest, unpretentious and lazy premises; this is simply something that I do not stand in this genre. Even when put aside all the budget limitations, the mediocre cast, the poorly staged set and scenarios destroying a possible atmospheric satisfaction, what really upsets is the fact that [i]Absolon[/i] was not produced, written, directed or acted with any kind of interest or a minimum enthusiasm.

Other miserable cyberpunks such as [i]Hardware[/i] and [i]Tank Girl[/i] presented a lot more worth of praise with an even minor cost. So it is sort of inexcusable that this particular attempt was such a disaster, even among tolerant sci-fi aficionados such as me. The plot could not be more formulaic and simple to follow; all that David Barto and Christopher Lambert should have done is abstain from being dull, and the movie would fall into the fair oblivion of average low-budget sci-fi (which was probably the main objective of the enterprise).

However, the short supply of involvement transpired by the crew was so painfully lucid that even the lowest standards shattered. Partial nudity of Kelly Brook and the brief but entertaining participation of Ron Perlman score some pitiable positive points, though not enough to indulge even the most malleable crowd.