Review of Spider-Man: Far From Home (2019) by Samichsupernova — 05 Apr 2022

Yeah, I'm seriously going to go there and give this a negative review, because Disney's android armies are here to bat for them. Now, normally the occasional plot hole or shoehorned story element that beggars belief does not bother me. But this movie is filled with absolutely bone-headed decisions by Parker (Holland does his best but at times seems confused - I blame constant rewrites as the writing is insufferable) and the plot? It's an amount of stupid that I just cannot handle. Just about the only highlights this film had to offer were the performance by Jake Gyllenhaal, and the fights, while heavily-reliant on CGI, are generally fun. I enjoyed the final fight scene and Zendaya's character is more interesting than in Homecoming. Even Ned is funny at times.

But that doesn't excuse poor writing that presents a whiny character that scarce resembles the selfless Peter Parker, who was motivated by PROTECTING THOSE CLOSEST TO HIM!!! Absolutely none of the choices Peter Parker makes in this film is for the right reason, or for the noblest intent. Minor SPOILER here... Mysterio's trick on Peter could only have worked if he knew what an incredible bonehead this kid is. Biggest and most unexplained plot failure right there.

And that scene where they tried to convince me that Peter understands the ramifications of Multiverse theory being real? **** all you did was copy out the textbook come the **** on. You obviously cannot write characters smarter than you are, so why didn't you bring in an expert to help you with that scene?

Oh, I'll tell you why. It's ****ing laziness.

My wife and Mom were just as exasperated as I was to see what Peter does in the bus. I walked out of the room right there because it was so poorly motivated, realized, or executed.

This tottering fool of a director, Jon Watts, could have more judiciously chopped this movie down. Trim the bad jokes, tuck the padding, and improve the character choices...

Here's another one for you. Why the ever-loving cuss, after seeing the projection, didn't Parker IMMEDIATELY call Nick Fury?!? That he simply doesn't want to be involved with him ENDANGERS EVERYONE and PUTS THE CITY OF LONDON AT RISK OF MASS CASUALTIES. IT BEGGARS CUSSING BELIEF.

All you needed to fix this was one line of dialogue.

Spider-Man: *receives a call from Nick Fury, answers*.

Nick Fury: Line's compromised - I'll call you back.

They wouldn't even need to drag Samuel L. Jackson out of bed. Have the guy send a voice recording from his phone. No one can tell the cussing difference anyway, because the sound mix is so sloppy! Also worst Giacchino score!! Come on dude! Fallin' asleep at the wheel here! Love, a fan.