Review of Star Wars: Episode III - Revenge of the Sith (2005) by Evilnice — 22 Sep 2009

After writing a huge rant here I've chose to delete it all and replace it with something that is decent, relevent, amusing and that neatly sums everything up (Lucas take note) We watched the first 3 films.

We cared about a mysterious force without explanation. We enjoyed hating Darth Vaders weezing. Harrison Ford was cool. We all wanted Liea in THAT bikini. We all wanted to own a light sabre. We all thought the cute fluffy things we're cute and fluffy.

We watched 3 more films. We didn't care about some fandangled unexplainable force. We all hated General Grievousnesses wheezing. Harrison Ford didn't continue his decade long trend of appearing in bad films.

We all wanted Padme to slap Hannakin. We all got a light sabre for christmas. We all thought the clumsy, jokey characters were clumsy and jokey. But that's not why this film is bad. It's the final fight scene of the final Star Wars film.

Good vs Evil, we've watched 6 films just to see how one of our favourite film baddies turns from a whimsical, indecisive, unemotional freak into an all powerful, unforgiving yet emotional freak. And what do we get? Handbags at dawn.

...... "You're evil" "No! You're evil!" "Well you're eviler!" "Well you're evilererer!!!" We then realise that all along we actually know all the story and that we're watching a pointless cash-in.