Review of Wrong Turn 3: Left for Dead (2009) by Tasos L — 02 Nov 2012

Ah the (for now) final chapter to the Wrong Turn franchise. Where to begin. I've never really liked this series, but at the same time have always seemed to be entertained by these films. The series as a whole seems to be aspiring to the mediocrity of it's idles. Yes, recycled slasher motifs, bad acting and worse scriptwriting/directing are plentiful in this final installment, just as they were in the first two, and at the end I'm never really sure if I loved it, hated it or was indifferent. The truth is it's probably all three at the same time, so who the fuck knows how I really feel about it. What I like about these films is they know exactly what most horror movie fans want, and it delivers, while not always in the exact way that I like I still can't help but give at least some props to a movie who understands its audience and want's to cater to them. That being said while doing this they also seem to want to put the audience down by insulting the fuck out of its intelligence and really aiming for the lowest common denominator of said audience. Yes CGI gore, unsurprising "surprise" endings and generic characters are the flavour of the day. Meanwhile, this doesn't even feel like a film that belongs to the Wrong Turn franchise. The inbred, mutant , cannibal hillbillies are only there as an afterthought. The film is about something else entirely, but since this is Wrong Turn 3 they have to be there in some capacity.

I think I know where this film in particular went wrong, but the same problem existed in the first two installments as well. You know that kid in your 9th grade Math class, that hated math class, had no interest in math class, but still had to go to math class everyday anyways? The one who had no hope of ever actually understanding or appreciating the material being discussed there, but maybe.... juuuuust maybe, might be able to scrape by with a passing grade and move on to the next year's math class. Well this series is that kid. He (or she) has been pulled through the system pushing and screaming. The teacher didn't get anything aside from a pay cheque to teach Math to the kid. The Kid didn't get anything by taking the class except perhaps a D or more likely summer school. And the kids classmates, they were either irratated, bored or indifferent to this kid and his whole struggle to acheive 9th grade math. Not sure if that whole analogy will make sense to anyone but me, but I'll stand by it. For now at least...

In short this film isn't "so bad it's good". Its not bad. Its not good. It is very generic and mediocre. Its a little entertaining but whether this is by mistake or on purpose continues to remain to be seen. It also remains to be seen if the people involved even had their hearts and minds in the right place. Was this a valiant fuck up or a shameless cash grab? Were they trying to make a good movie but failed, or trying to make a really bad movie but failed. Who know's.

Either way this movie only works when your thinking about it in these terms. Watch it if your bored. Its not the worst movie I've seen this week, it's far from the best as well, but I really don't think it gives a shit anyways. This movie is destined to fall into the realm of obscurity before long, if it isn't there already, and really, who cares anyways. The people who brought you this feature sure as fuck don't. TOTAL FUCKING NIHILISM.