Review of X-Men: Apocalypse (2016) by Marc5477 — 19 Jul 2016

Well lets get the pluses out of the way.

That was quick, now on to the negatives. The CG in this film is atrocious and extremely distracting. I dont know what happened but many of the 3d models looked unfinished especially their textures. They surfaces look too perfect and the effects from powers like Magneto looked very cheesy as well.

Next, Apocalypse is about 5 feet tall and his armor looks life foam... the quality of costumes and makeup for his character were a travesty and reminded me of the kind of stuff you see in low budget TV shows like Dr. Who. The only thing he had going for him was his synthesized voice.

Next, this was a sort of origins type story for the prominent X-Men but it strays a bit from the comics. This is fine and well if the origins made sense, but they didnt. For instance, Storm is depicted as an Arab with a Mohawk running around Egypt stealing and living on the streets. Well lets assume for a second that all that is believable, the question is why in blazes does she just use wind or other powers to take what she wants? She clearly had the powers already, yet she still got her hands dirty for almost no reason.

Then we have Quicksilver (again) who is basically a God but somehow manages to be completely useless (yet again) despite having the power to pretty much end the story on his own. For instance, he could have found Charles and ran him to another continent during the showdown but instead he decides to go meet daddy because you know... he couldnt make time for both... oh wait... yea he could have. He could have saved Charles, plucked all the feathers off Angel, stripped Psylocke to her panties, shaved Storms head, grabbed a Cappuccino from Starbucks and he still would have had time to spare to talk to daddy... but no... instead he decides to go talk to dad and then go and fight Apocalypse. And then there is the fight... he could have skewered Apocalypse with 1000 shiesh kabobs, lit his feet on fire, teabagged him a few times, and then severed his head with a butter knife but nope... what does he do? Slaps him a few times and punches him in the gut... whatever.

Next we have Charles who was basically worthless despite being able to control pretty much anyone he wants. At any time, he could have controlled any of the horsemen but instead he just sat around useless crying for help. Jean was also practically worthless until she "let go" and allowed her powers out which meant, we got to see a glimpse of the Phoenix again (yay... not). In the movies she has become a one trick pony because the movie writers think this is all she is good for. Oh what else... at least the didnt mess up Scotts part then again he didnt really do much anyway except mow down a door.

Just a lot of wasted action and I have played 15 year old video games with better CG than this.